In which the Inexcusable Blogging Sabbatical is Excused by Tremendous Before and After Photos

Here's why I've been gone so long (she writes to the nonexistent readers, who've--what?--been checking in loyally for the past nine months, just wishing this day would come...):

(Before)

Yeah, that's my sewing room, basically for the last six or seven months. I've probably cleaned it once since the last time I posted here, but it quickly deteriorated to the condition pictured above. May I just say, Egads. I was frightened to go anywhere near it until circumstances dictated that I simply had to deal with it.

I was ready to grab the dog, torch the house and use the photos (Yes, there are more! Each grislier and more shocking than the last!) as my defense when the arson case came to trial. I bet the right jury would have let me off with probation and a suspended sentence or something. Not bad when you look closely at this photograph.

But I didn't gamble on the vagaries of our loophole-ridden legal system! I behaved like the grown woman I am, like the Better Homes and Gardens subscriber I am, like the wife and wannabe mom and gracious host I am. Not like the scatterbrained, sloppy, lazy, drunk and oblivious lunatic I used to be. See, the Sarah I used to be entertained notions of arson-as-a-viable-solution much more seriously than the Sarah I am. Plus, that other Sarah didn't have a Dyson. Or a husband who has probably never entertained the notion of arson-as-viable-solution, seriously or otherwise. (There is still enough of the old Sarah in me to admit that the Dyson was more of a motivator in this instance than was the level-headed husband.)

When I finally tackled the wretched project (with elbow grease, and not the kind that doubles as a fire accelerant), I'm ashamed to say it was finished in a matter of hours--I could have done it a lot sooner. Fabric and old files are so thoroughly pile-able, you know? Once the piling (and folding and cramming-into-trash-bags and stacking boxes and sorting and vacuuming picking-needles-and-straightpins-out-of-the-carpet...) had been done, it was kind of like...

****poof!****

(After)

OH MY GOD I COULD LOOK AT THESE PICTURES ALL DAY!

Then I came here to blog about it and I realized the last thing I posted was a little crazy (if you're there or ever were, sorry). Maybe somewhere there's a place for that stuff, but I think I'm going to say this isn't that place. So it will be a return to the domicile around here--food, sewing, maybe some before and after pictures of our bedroom once our long-term (and very welcome) houseguests move into their new digs sometime in the next few weeks. Also, I have a very big (for still-a-slowpoke-beginner me) project I've been working on since last year, which I'm very slowly finishing by hand these days. I think I'm ready to post pictures sometime soon.

But let's not get ahead of ourselves, girl. Let's allow this image to soothe the savage, sloppy beast for a little while longer: